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Crazy Cat Lady Must Eat Cat Hair Every Two Hours

January 30, 2013

HuffPostLisa habitually eats her kitty’s hair — off the floor, off the couch — but her favorite way is licking it right off the cat. The 43-year-old Detroit, Mich., woman cannot go more than two hours without consuming her feline’s fur and has digested more than 3,200 hairballs since her addiction began, according to a segment of TLC’s “My Strange Addiction.” Dr. Andre Fedida, a gastroenterologist in Newark, N.J. (who does not treat Lisa), told The Huffington Post she “probably” has a trichobezoar, a mass of hair in her digestive tract. According to the Mayo Clinic, trichobezoars “may occur in people with psychiatric illness or developmental disabilities.”

So much wrong with this story. Who the fuck has been counting how many hairballs she shits? Is it her? Like she deuces out a hairball and writes it in her hello kitty diary? Has some doctor been keeping an eye on her crazy ass from day one? Is it a TLC producer or intern? These questions need to be answered!

Masses of hair in the digestive tract occur because of psychiatric illness or disabilities huh? That’s the root cause? Like being retarded or schizo makes hairballs grow in your stomach? It’s not just the straight up fact that she’s eating hair?

Granted this bitch is definitely all sorts of crazy. She’s cuckoo for Kitty Tufts.

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