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Olympics Are Gonna Get Rid of a Sport

February 11, 2013

Evgenia Kanaeva - rhythmic gymnastics

Huff — IOC leaders are meeting this week to decide which sport to drop from the Olympic program and how to deal with the fallout from the Lance Armstrong doping scandal. At a two-day IOC executive board meeting opening Tuesday, the IOC will also review preparations for the Winter Olympics in Sochi – less than a year away – and the 2016 Summer Games in Rio de Janeiro, as well as select a short list of finalists for the 2018 Youth Olympics. Modern pentathlon, a tradition-steeped contest invented by the founder of the modern Olympics, is expected to face close scrutiny when the board considers which of the current 26 summer Olympic sports to remove from the program of the 2020 Games. Taking out one sport will make way for a new sport to be added to the program later this year.

I like it. There’s a bunch of events in the Olympics that just don’t make any sense. Of all the ones to get rid of though, they’re leaning towards the pentathlon? It might be the coolest event they have. Granted it’s not the most popular but combining fencing, horseback jumping, running, swimming, and laser pistols is pretty badass.

You can’t think of a better sport to get rid of? How bout:

Badminton:

This is a sport for pre teens at their great uncles house. It’s not a real sport. It’s a fucking lawn game. Why not just make horseshoes or bocci an Olympic sport if we’re gonna keep badminton around?

Nice shot aunt Jenny

 TaeKwonDo and Judo:

Not the most obvious ones here. I know what you’re thinking. Fighting is badass. There should be more of it at the Olympics. I absolutely agree. Which is why they should get rid of these pussy versions of fighting and just make MMA the category. Being restricted to a fighting style is retarded and the lack of potential to even see a knockout in these sports is ridiculous. Everybody wears pads and helmets and shit. Give the people what they want! Which is Chuck Liddell style beat downs that necessitate a mop bucket to clean up the blood stains afterwards.

Seriously watch a match on youtube. It looks like this

 The Entire Women’s Section of Athletics:

They’re ridiculous. Just absurd watching them compete in the same arena with dudes who can jump twice as high and run twice as fast. What happened to equal rights? Put ‘em in the same category as the men and see if they even come close to qualifying. Won’t happen because the JV men’s track team at your local high school can outrun every one of them. They can keep field hockey and women’s volleyball because… well just look:

PS. How is ribbon dancing a thing? I’d never even heard of it till I saw Old School.

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